How About a New Legacy?

My daughters are getting older.  Grace, who will be four in a few days, has become the epitome of her name overnight, it seems.  She seems to have inherited all of her parents' best genetic traits... and there is something inherently wrong with that thinking.  It must change before I continue that same lie for another generation.

Belief: there is not one damn thing wrong, aside from genetic material that would harm, with me - with anyone.  Not one.  Each gene carries in it, personified beauty and strength. 
Action (the untruth brought into action): I fear my daughter will inherit my butt, my thick waist, my back, my thick arms, my jaw, my tendency to gain weight, my insane cravings, etc. (And dear God, if anyone writes to me to make me feel better about myself, I'll scream... it's not the point.  I am fine!)

What she learns: Mommy's butt/waist/back/jaw/arms/metabolism/etc. is flawed and undesirable and if I (she) inherits those things, I (she) will also be flawed and undesirable.  And the lie is continued. 

As you all know, I am on the treacherous quest to loving myself - truly loving myself - not despite of (that is in fact giving in to the same crap - that same idea that there is some standard to which we are not measuring), but in inclusion of.  My dear, dear roommate and friend, Natalie and I were having a candid conversation - we had many, many those days.  I think we were actually discussing body image and of course, I had to mention the butt thing, because I just can't miss the opportunity to rip on it.  You know what she told me?  She said, “I think it's beautiful - it's shaped like a heart."  It was the first time I heard my tushy tush described against a clean slate of beauty - no judgment, uncompared, loving.  I just went, "hum" on the inside and walked away with the desire to keep walking there.  Natalie, by the way, is someone who has the ability to love everyone and everything unconditionally and passionately.  She has the grandest and most open soul and she spreads it everywhere.  She lives in abundance.  Her love makes you feel phenomenal and beautiful without once thinking of your appearance, for thinking of your appearance would degrade your true beauty.  What a way to be.  What a way to be. 

And this, my friends, is the legacy I wish to lavish on my little girls.  -That a mere hesitance on the state of their outer beauty would be a disservice to their true beauty.  I want to teach them to look through to themselves and to others.  I've no doubt they will find beauty all around them, in all forms, shapes, colors, sizes, practices - no standards, no judgments - just honest recognition of the God within.  How radiant and perfect!


So, the question comes up:  make up, taking care of your body, blah, blah, blah. 
Make-up: I think make up indulges the myth that a person needs help to be beautiful.  It goes against all that stuff I wrote up above. But we do live in a society that does have standards we are somewhat obliged to abide by.  I think if I instill all that other stuff in them, they will not feel they have to rely on it to feel beautiful.  That, thank God, is truly broken out of me.  The Month with a Mirror did that for me.
Taking Care of Your Body: This means respecting this amazing body we have been given.  It means I have the honor of teaching my children to care for it by feeding it nourishing and nutritious foods that don't cause cravings and blood sugar spikes.  I teach better choices.  I teach physical activity.  I teach laughter.  I teach prayer and meditation.  These things - this basic love and respect is what is missing in a person whose body is off course, and these things are what will set them on cause again. The motivation is being healthy and vibrant.  All else will follow. 

This plan is the only plan that can be applied to all human beings with the same result: that you are beautiful, not despite or in spite, but inclusive of every cell in your body.  This is what you tell humanity.  This is what you tell your Down syndrome children, your healthy children, those with congenital malformations (which are really just so because they are measured against a standard, unless it hinders development).  The list goes on.  The challenge, I dare say, to believe and take action on it is equal whether you have the developmentally challenged child or the healthy child, in that they both struggle to learn the truth about beauty and will be dramatically changed forever by what they find.  Let's help them find the truth by helping ourselves live the truth in front of them.  It could be the new epidemic!  Who's with me?

I truly hope you readers will begin to participate in this dialogue.  I am not writing for sympathy of commits about me.  I am writing in hopes to start a candid and honest dialogue about issues we are afraid to talk about.  I want to know how anything makes you feel or think, whether remorseful, angry, opposing, sad, excited, etc.  Please comment.  Let's talk about this world we're living in and raising our children in.  It's ours, and despite popular belief, we can shape it.  I am also open to suggestions of new topics.